A Father's Perspective

Sharing with friends about the adoption has been really exciting! The majority of responses have been filled with support and enthusiasm. Many have shared that adoption has long been on their hearts. Some believe it is something they would whole-heartedly love to do in the future...and a few shared that it is something they would love to do but hubby isn't on board. Even though I did not experience that- in fact- I was quite blessed to experience the very opposite- I did want to take the time to address it. Because my husband has been 100% in support and blazing the paper chase trail (it's the natural marathoner in him I believe!) I thought it might be fun to get him to participate in a little interview type style post. He's a little like super dad right now- carrying around his little pink accordion folder and making sure all is in place- can you say administratively gifted? Okay- that's a mouthful- how about AWESOME? So here goes....straight from the source....


Did you always feel open to adoption?
It wasn't something I had seriously considered but I would not say it was something I was closed off to.

What changed in your life that allowed you to consider adoption?
In April of 2011, while reading Radical, my perspective on a lot of things changed. My eyes were opened to the orphan crisis in many third world countries. My wife shared with me what she was learning and seeing on adoption blogs and I began to feel my heart softening to the needs of these children.

Does adoption seem like an easy decision now?
In a lot of ways, it seems like the only decision.

What kind of impact do you think it will have on your biological children? Are you concerned about them at all?
I'm sure they will be impacted significantly. In a lot of ways I don't know that I can foresee exactly how it will impact them. But, long-term, what our children will learn is that we do what we believe. Ultimately, it will show them that there is more to life- that the world does not exist solely as they know it- other children are not as comfortable and are in true need. They will learn love in the truest form.

Are you stressed out about how this will affect your family financially? Adoption isn't cheap!
True- adoption isn't cheap. Some time ago we started saving money, never really knowing what we were going to do with it. Now we know that God was laying the groundwork to allow us to get this adoption rolling. We still have a ways to go, however, in reading books such as Radical, The Barbarian Way, and Revolution in World Missions, I have realized that there is substantial excess that can be cut out of our lives to allow more of our resources to be put to use in God's plans for our lives.

So what are you gonna do once they are here? LOOOTTSS of mouths to feed LOL...
Ever heard of Ramen Noodles??

Very funny- you know your wife loves to cook right?
It's not going to be easy- I know we are going to have to make some sacrifices to meet needs, but again cutting out excesses and material possessions to give a child a home is worth it.

Do you think bonding with the child you adopt will be the same as with your biological children?
When I think about it, I see no difference, and I imagine a little black boy running up to me and hugging me when I get home from work. However, the reality is, I won't witness that miracle of birth that immediately creates that bond, in fact, the first meeting and early days may be the exact opposite and the child may have a rough transition and we'll have to work through it.

How do you anticipate answering the question 'are they all really yours?' from well-meaning strangers on the street?
Yes, they all drive me equally crazy.

What is one thing you wish all men who were hesitating on adoption knew?
I think I would encourage all men (and anyone) to really ask themselves "why aren't I adopting?"- to really question what it is that is holding them back from making the decision. And if the answer is a fear of leaving the level of comfort that they are maintaining in life- well, you won't, but then I'd have to say what is really true Christianity- and that is answering God's call- not meaning to sound all high and mighty here- but God has called us to adopt...James 1:27 Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.


Why do you take care of all the paperwork...is your wife really unorganized?
Yes. Let's face it- the wait for a referral is long enough- we don't need her losing the important documents!

So there it is folks!! Maybe I will add another installment as we get further in the process- if you have any questions for him he says he is an open-book, just go on and post them in the comments and we'll get you the next time around!