IF...

I came across this statistic on another adoption blog...how many Christians would it take to adopt all the orphans in the world? As challenging and convicting as it may be...it's a good question. 


"Therefore, if roughly 6% of the born again Christians in the world adopted we could care for all the adoptable orphans in the world (I have heard 7% used and that might be true as well)."


See full article here: http://abbafund.wordpress.com/2009/10/19/how-many-christians-would-it-take-to-adopt-all-the-orphans-in-the-world/


I'm not sure what number would sound impossible- but 6% certainly doesn't sound impossible to me! 

What I do Know...

A good friend gave me some great advice today. She texted me "Maybe make a list of every single thing that you're afraid of and then cross off everything you think God can't handle." Well- what I am afraid of is what I don't know. I don't know how long we will wait, I don't know how I will meet my child and say "good-bye for now", I don't know how difficult the transition home will be for any of us, I don't know how little man and little miss will handle the addition of a new sibling, I don't know how we will communicate at first with a possible language barrier.....I don't know a lot. But what I do know is that God can handle EVERY SINGLE ONE of these things because God is all-powerful...For nothing is impossible with God (Luke 1:37).

On a recent car ride I let me emotions get the better of me- this happens everyone once in a while  A LOT! And because God is timely like this- it just so happened that this song played on the car radio...

                                            (pause music at bottom of page)

As I listened to the words of this song I feel like I realized for the first time that it really doesn't matter what we don't know....what I do know is that we will be filled with love like never before AND fulfilling God's call....and knowing that HE will hold us together even in the moments when it feels like we are falling apart.

Is Adoption Trendy?

Courtesy of Dictionary.com

Trendy

–adjective

1.of, in, or pertaining to the latest trend  or style.

2.following the latest trends  or fashions; up-to-date or chic:the trendy young generation.

3.appealing to faddish taste: a trendy hotel.

When I think of trendy, I think of the Coach bag I had to have, the Puma shoes I needed to specially order because everyone had them but they didn't sell my large size in the store, the Burberry coat I was surprised with several Christmases ago, and the Gymboree clothes that my children really need! I think of things that everyone wants, desires, and ultimately convinces themselves that they need in order to “fit in”. These things are essentially extra’s, things we can survive without- desires of our flesh. 

So- why do we think we need these things? Perhaps all of our friends have them, or we saw them advertised in such a catchy way that we can’t get them out of our heads....or perhaps the latest and greatest celebrity has it. Hmmmm...does anyone see where I am going with this yet?

Adoption has certainly become more recognizable since photos of celebrity’s adopted children have debuted on magazine covers. Now, for all of those Americans who don’t stay up till midnight searching adoption blogs- there is a face to the orphans of the world. And, if Angelina is doing it- surely a whole bunch of other people are too....right?

Yes, Ethiopian adoptions have increased in number. But, when you consider the 4.4 million orphans living in the country- the roughly 2,500 that were adopted into forever families during the year 2010 doesn’t really seem to make a dent. Some nights I go to bed, after reading 15-20 blogs of families adopting from Ethiopia, and really truly believe that EVERYONE I know is adopting from Ethiopia. A few hours of sleep later I am back in the real world and realizing that I do NOT know anyone personally who has adopted from Ethiopia.....but I do know an awful lot of people with my same Coach bag....Yes, it’s true- I do NOT know anyone personally who has adopted from Ethiopia and yet here I am, stepping out in faith, not because Angelina did it...but because God did it. 

The reality is...I WISH adoption was trendy. I WISH that people (including myself) were not questioning “Am I crazy?” I WISH it was trendy because then- when I brought my child home- I wouldn’t even have to think twice about the fact that we WILL be a biracial family- which in and of itself brings challenges and transitions. BUT, above all, I WISH it was trendy, because if it was- there would be no such thing as a waiting child, there would be no such thing as a street child- living on their own among trash and illness....If adoption was trendy- Coach would be claiming bankruptcy and the word ORPHAN would be extinguished from our vocabulary. If adoption was trendy.....you wouldn’t be reading this blog. 

Waiting...

Waiting...waiting...waiting. There is a whole lot of waiting going on in our lives right now- and NOT just on the adoption front. Obviously we have not reached the MAJOR waiting point- the time from which our dossier reaches Ethiopia until we receive a referral- that time is still quite a ways away from us. The waiting right now is for little paperwork pieces and mostly in other components of our life. But the real waiting that is impacting me this week is not even my own waiting- it is the waiting children in Ethiopia. The children that have been waiting anywhere from a few months to years for a family. If we, the adopting families here in America, feel like we are waiting- I can't even begin to imagine what the waiting must feel like on the other end. I can't describe what it does to me any better than to say it literally hurts my heart. I ache for what I cannot possibly give all of them- a home. I can't imagine being 12 years old and hoping that one day- just the right person will see my picture on a waiting child list and choose me. I can't imagine that just the right person will overlook that I have been living in an institution, malnourished, improperly disciplined, insecurely attached, and so on. I can't imagine hoping that just the right person will think "this child is a perfect fit for my home!" I can't imagine hoping that just the right person will overlook all the challenges that adding me to their family might bring and yet still decide that I am worth it. I can't imagine all that. That is a lot of waiting and wondering for somebody so young. And yet, that is the reality for SO SO SO many children. I do not yet know who the Lord will bring us- only He knows the blessing He has in store for our family at the end of this journey. But this week, I am committing to praying for the waiting children. The children who, themselves, are praying for a family. This week I am remembering them, loving them from afar, and praying that their waiting will soon come to an end.

One Blessed Mommy...

Today, at 6am, I prayed a simple prayer...

I asked God for patience that would last the day...

That I would strive less to be a perfect mother...

And more the mother that my children would remember....

Loving them deeply...

Enjoying them fully...

And creating lasting memories.

So, what I discovered is that God listens to all prayers, even the simple ones prayed from bed with one eye still closed- because we had a great day! We played outside before 8am- filling a bucket with bubbles and having fun with lots of different bubble wands. We picked blackberries with friends, ate ice cream BEFORE lunch (at least we ate lunch too!), ate dinner as a family, and took an early evening bike ride/walk. Everybody was in a great mood today- or maybe I was in a great mood- sometimes that makes all the difference!

Hope everyone's week is off to a great start!

And A 14.7 Update!!

I apologize that I have failed to give a 14.7 update until now! Well- I took on that goal not quite realizing that the "little jump" from 10-11 miles a week to 14.7 miles would be such a challenge for me! I know it doesn't seem like a huge jump but for some reason it was for me. So the first two weeks of July I fell short of my goal- whether due to training issues, the heat we have been experiencing, or sick kids. Either way- it did not happen the first two weeks! However, this past week I did it! I got in a long run on the treadmill at the gym that definitely helped get the mileage up! Today I ran three miles with the kids- they were so well-behaved it was almost eerie LOL! I so wanted to give up with about a fourth of a mile left so I tried to get little man excited about it so he would cheer me along. He started yelling, "Yay mommy, you're almost there, go!!!" Well we hit the three mile marker-( did I mention they are REAALLY starting to weigh down the stroller??) and I was SO excited! Even little man who is not really aware of the 14.7 goal was so happy and he just made my day by saying, "Mommy, daddy is going to be so proud of you when he gets home!" So, we're going for it again next week- wish us luck!!

What I'm Learning...

A conversation little man and I had while driving today:

Little man: My song isn't coming back on mommy, it was about Jesus and now it is over.

Me: All of the songs are about Jesus, let's listen to the next one.

Little man: But mom (very whiny), I don't know where Jesus is, I can't see Him.

Me: Remember what your book said- He's always with you, even if you can't see Him.

Little man: But mom, He's not here, where is God?

Me: (Really trying to phrase this right!) Well, remember what we said, God is in heaven and Jesus is with him and will come again.

Little man: But we could go there, I think we have to take a car, it's very far away.

Oh, how I love a three year old trying to grasp what I'm still trying to grasp at 27 (almost 28) years (yes, my birthday is soon!).  I am amazed everyday to hear him trying to sort through all of this information. It is absolutely the most wonderful stage. Last week, his fascination centered around the story of David and Goliath and he continually asked, "Mommy, why that little boy knock the giant down?" My husband did story time with him the other night and read the story of Mary and Martha...he came downstairs afterwards and said, "You know that Children's Bible is great, but man, it is hard to explain some of those stories to a three year old!" We are continually amazed with our little man's love for Jesus- and amazed at what he is grasping. Last week, when my parent's were visiting, out of the blue he announced at dinner, "Jesus is coming to get mommy, daddy, and me and taking us to meet his friends." I asked him where Jesus' friends were and he said, "In heaven." No, we don't make a practice of teaching our preschooler about the rapture- I'm really not sure where he picked up on that! But it did bring tears to my eyes! 

In the last few weeks, I have felt a lot like my three year old. We've encountered some situations lately that have really caused me to step out in my faith. By nature, I often assume the worst. So, even if you tell me that the chances are 80% good and 20% bad, I will harp on the 20%. But, I am learning (very very slowly) that I can sit and ruminate in my fearful thoughts- or I can believe for the good. Yes, I will still chew every cuticle down and pick all my nail polish off- but these last two weeks in my fear, I have sought God. I have asked for prayer and ministering and found comfort in scripture. I have always had faith-but I have never put my faith to work like I have lately. So often, it seems individuals think how unfair it is that God would "allow" bad things to happen to good people. When, in fact, that is the furthest thing from the truth. We so often forget that with the fall came evil and free will- and sin. It is clear that things will happen that won't feel good- but it is our response, our growth, and our faith in these situations that brings us closer to God. Over the last two weeks, this is what I have been slowly learning. And yes, I definitely had one or two days when my stress got the better of me and my response to certain situations was far from Christian-like. Today however, I rejoice in lots of good news- and a renewed sense of peace- and to Him goes all the glory and praise!

Two Steps Forward, One Step Back.... finding joy in the Paper Chase!

So during the last week and a half that my parents were visiting I was feeling VERY productive....lots of paperwork being wrapped up for the home study, things being notarized, kids TB tests, my physical...and the list goes on! And then today....the phone rings....with the news that my blood work is back and they've added the results to my form, but oops- they forgot to do the HIV test! So back to the doctor I will go this week. Yes, in a lot of ways this paper chase feels a little like we're always taking two steps forward and one step back! At the kids' pediatrician yesterday, I found out we could get little miss's paperwork taken care of, but little man hasn't been there for a well check-up (we recently switched offices) so we need to wait on that appointment. Another reminder that I don't have total control over this situation! Somedays over the last week I have thought- wow- I'm about as exhausted as I would be if someone were chasing me LOL! But then, there are A LOT of moments when my heart absolutely overflows with the joy of knowing what the end result will bring! I also need to keep reminding myself that the home study portion is no where near what we will soon encounter when we begin working hard core on our dossier!!!

This week we purchased little man a new carseat so little miss can inherit his. She is still being toted around in the infant carrier and well, mommy's back is getting a little tired! So on the way out the door today he asked, "I get to ride in my new car seat?" I explained that we hadn't installed it yet but soon he would get to ride in the new one and baby sister would be using his old one. I decided to test the waters a little and said, "What should we do with the baby car seat? Maybe a new baby will come to live with us." Boy, did he shock me when he answered, "YEA! A baby sister, I want another sister!" I just about fell over! I had just assumed he would refute that idea! Or, at the very least request a brother! Well- at this point, we have decided not to request a specific gender- so I guess we will all be surprised together. A point I find ironic- since we HAD to know with our first two children ASAP!

So today, for a lot of reasons, I am reminded of a sermon we heard this past Sunday while visiting a church up in McLean.


James 1:2-4
2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4 Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.


I am so excited to see where this adoption journey takes me (and my faith) personally. I often hear about other's struggles and think- I am not strong enough for that! But I remind myself that even when faced with a hardship or struggle it's not all about me- I am not facing it alone- I have Jesus. So often though, I forget to turn to Him first. I don't think I am strong enough to travel to Ethiopia, meet my child, and then leave them until we are cleared to bring them home. That very thought horrifies me. I KNOW without a doubt, that I will NOT be able to do that without the peace and comfort that only Christ can bring me. There is nothing in my earthly flesh that alone will provide the strength to do that. Only with Him, will I find that strength. And again for the zillionth time this month I am reminded of Philippians 4:13, "I can do all things through Him who gives me strength." So, no, I'm probably not capable of going through everyone else's struggles and trials- but that is because they are not mine, I have my own to endure- and when I encounter what I must I have Christ along with me to provide what I need at just the right time! 

Another Post for the Boys...

After I posted my husband's interview I remembered watching a great youtube video- a coaching call to all dads! I thought I would share it all with you! 

I think it is safe to say that since returning home from our Home Study Orientation we have both felt a strong desire to move quickly through the remainder of the Home Study paperwork! And- I think we are almost there. The kids got their TB tests today. I was not anticipating how hard that would be for me. For some reason, I felt bad! I think it might be because at this point- they really don't have a clue what is going on! Sure, little man might notice that mommy and daddy have been hustling and bustling about- but let's face it- Grammy is still here so that is keeping him well-distracted! But he really doesn't understand that all the hustling and bustling has an end purpose. We have chosen to hold off sharing the news for right now. He is at the age where everything happens "after nap". "After nap" we go in the pool, "after nap" we go to Target, and most often "after nap" we will go to the park. So we just didn't feel it was a good idea to present an event that is mostly likely a year away just yet. So, we drove to the doctor under the premise that I had to drop off some paperwork (yes, I know that was wrong!) In the end, a TB test is really no more than a pinch and he didn't even respond right away. Little miss went second and screamed from the time he started crying until she left the office and was offered a bottle! All in all, after a few minutes my guilt started fading. I don't like seeing them hurt at all- but I kept telling myself- wow, if only they could understand what an amazing process they are a part of! I'm proud of them- even if they have no idea what they were doing!! 

A Father's Perspective

Sharing with friends about the adoption has been really exciting! The majority of responses have been filled with support and enthusiasm. Many have shared that adoption has long been on their hearts. Some believe it is something they would whole-heartedly love to do in the future...and a few shared that it is something they would love to do but hubby isn't on board. Even though I did not experience that- in fact- I was quite blessed to experience the very opposite- I did want to take the time to address it. Because my husband has been 100% in support and blazing the paper chase trail (it's the natural marathoner in him I believe!) I thought it might be fun to get him to participate in a little interview type style post. He's a little like super dad right now- carrying around his little pink accordion folder and making sure all is in place- can you say administratively gifted? Okay- that's a mouthful- how about AWESOME? So here goes....straight from the source....


Did you always feel open to adoption?
It wasn't something I had seriously considered but I would not say it was something I was closed off to.

What changed in your life that allowed you to consider adoption?
In April of 2011, while reading Radical, my perspective on a lot of things changed. My eyes were opened to the orphan crisis in many third world countries. My wife shared with me what she was learning and seeing on adoption blogs and I began to feel my heart softening to the needs of these children.

Does adoption seem like an easy decision now?
In a lot of ways, it seems like the only decision.

What kind of impact do you think it will have on your biological children? Are you concerned about them at all?
I'm sure they will be impacted significantly. In a lot of ways I don't know that I can foresee exactly how it will impact them. But, long-term, what our children will learn is that we do what we believe. Ultimately, it will show them that there is more to life- that the world does not exist solely as they know it- other children are not as comfortable and are in true need. They will learn love in the truest form.

Are you stressed out about how this will affect your family financially? Adoption isn't cheap!
True- adoption isn't cheap. Some time ago we started saving money, never really knowing what we were going to do with it. Now we know that God was laying the groundwork to allow us to get this adoption rolling. We still have a ways to go, however, in reading books such as Radical, The Barbarian Way, and Revolution in World Missions, I have realized that there is substantial excess that can be cut out of our lives to allow more of our resources to be put to use in God's plans for our lives.

So what are you gonna do once they are here? LOOOTTSS of mouths to feed LOL...
Ever heard of Ramen Noodles??

Very funny- you know your wife loves to cook right?
It's not going to be easy- I know we are going to have to make some sacrifices to meet needs, but again cutting out excesses and material possessions to give a child a home is worth it.

Do you think bonding with the child you adopt will be the same as with your biological children?
When I think about it, I see no difference, and I imagine a little black boy running up to me and hugging me when I get home from work. However, the reality is, I won't witness that miracle of birth that immediately creates that bond, in fact, the first meeting and early days may be the exact opposite and the child may have a rough transition and we'll have to work through it.

How do you anticipate answering the question 'are they all really yours?' from well-meaning strangers on the street?
Yes, they all drive me equally crazy.

What is one thing you wish all men who were hesitating on adoption knew?
I think I would encourage all men (and anyone) to really ask themselves "why aren't I adopting?"- to really question what it is that is holding them back from making the decision. And if the answer is a fear of leaving the level of comfort that they are maintaining in life- well, you won't, but then I'd have to say what is really true Christianity- and that is answering God's call- not meaning to sound all high and mighty here- but God has called us to adopt...James 1:27 Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.


Why do you take care of all the paperwork...is your wife really unorganized?
Yes. Let's face it- the wait for a referral is long enough- we don't need her losing the important documents!

So there it is folks!! Maybe I will add another installment as we get further in the process- if you have any questions for him he says he is an open-book, just go on and post them in the comments and we'll get you the next time around!

Where are we???

Ok, so I told you in yesterday's post that I would tell you where we are now! We are in McLean, VA for

our Home Study Orientation Meeting!! We just got back to the hotel a couple of hours ago from meeting with the social worker who went through the whole Home Study process with us. WOW- it was A LOT of information but so wonderful to see it all laid out! We turned in some paperwork and watched the list dwindle down to the few things we have left (specifically fingerprints, turning in our notarized physicals, and our criminal background checks, employment and non-employment letters) before we can schedule an official home study interview at our HOME! She presented some great information about the transition period once we bring our child home and I am definitely going to be purchasing this book....

We met a wonderful couple at the orientation who is adopting from China- so nice to meet other adopting families with our agency! It feels great to be moving along on this journey! Every check off on the list is one check closer!

SO- next- we have something exciting planned!!! Stay tuned....I am going to be interviewing my husband on his feelings concerning the adoption- for any momma praying for your husband's heart to be softened towards adoption check back in a couple of days to hear what he has to share....you never know how God is going to work!

THREE.

This past week has been wonderfully crazy busy....just the way I usually like it! But, that leaves one tired momma HA! Last weekend we celebrated my little man's THIRD birthday! Umm, where did the last three years go? My little man has the most AWESOME birthday....the FOURTH of JULY! No, we were not expecting him on the 4th at all! He was due on the 8th and we even thought he might be late...NOPE! What a fun day to remember! We celebrated his third birthday with his closest twenty friends or so LOL- he's got an extensive social agenda- ok, well maybe his mommy is the social butterfly and he is along for the ride. Either way, it was a great day and he had been looking forward to his party for so long.

                                                Happy Birthday sweet boy!

We had his party at a local kids' gym and our wonderful friend and photographer took pictures of him and his friends having LOTS of fun! He LOVES monster trucks (notice his awesome shirt) so I made this...

And not to leave out our little miss...

She wore a shirt that read "Silly Boys, Trucks are for girls". LOVE HER!!!

The day after the party my folks came down to celebrate with us. Over the course of the week they have been watching our little ones while we have run around like crazy taking care of appointments for the adoption process...today I completed my physical- YAY more to check off the list! And tomorrow I will let you know where we are now...

So three- WOW- you know what I think when I hear that number now..."I'm going to have THREE kids???" And you know what I hear from the Lord- "Hmmm, just three?" LOVE IT!!! There is no limit to our AWESOME creator- I will never limit him in this AWESOME life he has blessed me with!




Thank you to our sweet friends....Vonartphotography.com!

My Next Read....

We are getting ready to begin some of the required and recommended reading that goes along with the adoption process, however, my husband just finished a great read~ life-changing, thought-provoking- and well, I simply can't let this one get by me...

This book provided some AWESOME discussion on our date-night tonight! We are certainly not that couple that has nothing new and exciting to say to each other over dinner anymore- I LOVE IT! Of course- more often than not we are passionately debating from the same side!


Just wanted to post it here in case anyone was up for reading along!

The reality...

For me, seeing or reading about others who have traveled the adoption road makes it all seem more real to me! Since deciding to adopt I feel like the number of hours of sleep I get has decreased tremendously. I'm sure those of you who have walked this path know exactly what I am talking about...there is a whole lot of adoption blog reading, gotcha day video watching, and learning about Ethiopia to do!!! Of course, this is all compounded by the fact that my little princess wakes up by 5:30am each morning ready to GO! I wanted to share with you all one of the gotcha day videos that really impacted us during our short time frame of considering adoption....I say short time because I am pretty sure when you are done watching this you will understand how we quickly came to realize that not only was this something we COULD do, it was something we desperately NEEDED to do for so many reasons! What struck me so deeply was watching this little girl come home to a FAMILY- to BROTHERS and SISTERS! Sure, there are lots of kids in an orphanage- but that's not what it means to have siblings though....siblings are the ones who drop everything for you and love you no matter what- and now she has that- 6 times over! It still brings tears to my eyes!! So here it is- the Gotcha Day video that changed it all for me...